I have occasionally dabbled in lucid dreaming. At the peak of my interest, I was able to consistently become aware of the nature of this nocturnal hallucination. Unfortunately, I rarely gained agency of my own body, forced to view the events of the dream like a phantom that possessed another as a mere observer. On the occasions that I could gain access to my dream self’s body, I would wake up.
The one time, I was able to gain complete control, I was finally given the opportunity to ask the ultimate question that lucid dreamers want so desperately to be able to answer: What should I do now?
In the heat of the moment, when anything was possible, I raised up my hands and tried to raise an entire city from the ground. I am disappointed to tell you that I woke up, embarrassed at the memory of how foolish I probably looked to whatever deities were looking into my mind through their cosmic windows. They were probably laughing at me and I can’t blame them. I would have done the same.
Like most aspiring writers, the narrative scope is a temptation. There is a desire to make our stories reach far and wide, to be able to express the vastness that is existence. Even the likes of the absolutely ordinary can become a sprawling epic in the hands of writers like James Joyce. There are so many tropes and ideas that can be used. Political ideology and philosophical concepts to draw upon. In many ways, this is the promise that writing offers storytellers, a chance to be uninhibited in their creations.
The digital age has created a trend in these larger stories. All of these new technologies that used to only be in the hands of large studios are available to the masses. There is still a cost of production but it has never been so accessible in the way it is now. I spent the entirety of last year chipping away at Homestuck, the web-comic epic that in my opinion, is one of the greatest works of literary fiction to ever be realized. It is ambitious in both narrative and physical construction, with over 8000 pages, consists of text, video, audio, and minigames. While the story is now owned by VIZ Media, it started off as a small passion project by author, Andrew Hussie, who just wanted to make silly stories in MS Paint.
This year, I am making my way through One Piece in the hopes of being able to catch up before the mangaka finally ends his epic comic now over 1000 chapters and still going strong. So far, it is amazing. I can feel the progression of 14 years worth of writing as the story continues to get bigger and bigger.
The Marvel Cinematic Universe is the biggest example of the popularization of large stories. These are interconnected narratives with individual threads that ultimately connect to a universe expanding tales. They are full-on social events in themselves, creating a reason for people to commune, discuss, and celebrate their favorite stories. On the internet, you can’t go two-page clicks or scrolls in your media feed without some news about the MCU.
Yet, I think back to some of my favorite auteurs and their stories. Kurt Vonnegut, Quentin Tarintino. My favorite book to this day is still Fahrenheit 451. Despite its lean 46,118 word count, the story still hits me with the philosophical, social, political, and spiritual atom bomb that it always does. Every time I pick it up, the details of this literary blast become ever more clear to me. I can feel the individual ripples in the spiritual flames as it burns each moment into my soul like a welding torch. More of these ideas, previously hidden to me by naivety and inexperience, become revealed as I come to see these concepts in each individual atom of smoke.
Many other stories have had this effect on me. Slaughterhouse-Five. Valis. Flowers for Algernon. Many of my favorite films as well. Pulp Fiction. Inception. The Iron Giant. These stories share a commonality in that they are self-contained. Regardless of scope (which can be regarding both physical and emotional depth), these stories feel complete by themselves. Some of these might be considered long as a singular experience but when compared to the likes of other mediums that are rooted in serial narratives, they are but a blink of an eye.
While these writers will occasionally make small connections in their work, they still make sure to maintain a cohesive experience in their works. Tarintino has made several familial connections between various characters across his works. Vonnegut had a “fiction suit” through the likes of the fictional author, Kilgore Trout. Stephen King has the best of both worlds, tying many of his stories to the Dark Tower.
Perhaps, this convergence in the global world through physical and digital spaces has not only allowed people to create larger and larger narratives but also made it something of an expectation. I wonder if the amount of worlds that we as humans have created is beyond that of what we have actually explored or is even possible to explore.
It all ends up putting this pressure on me. I want to write these giants, epic tales. I want to explore hundreds of complex characters, each a small part of a Super-organism of a cast. I want to say grand things about the nature of existence. I want to project ideas on a macro and micro level, providing conclusions about everything and nothing. More than anything, I want to provide readers with a tool to help them live and die well.
It might seem silly to have this perspective but I don’t think I am the only one with these ideas. In fact, the writing group I had in college shared similar aspirations. This is the trap that I have set for myself in recent years. I have tried to constantly bite more than I can chew, swallow, and digest. It results in everything coming out like crap that’s either too dense to comprehend or barely put together.
As I continue in any of my creative ventures, I am still going to aim high and set my sights beyond the heavens. I just don’t want to keep repeating these cycles of trying to create with reckless abandon, to attempt to create entire worlds from nothing without the experience of creating everything within it. Perhaps, the next time I awake in my own dreams, I will start creating smaller things first. A single skyscraper shouldn’t be too hard.
Danger Wonka 